So, Long time no talk, ammirite?
You wanna know why? Because I have been trying to keep myself sane and my head above water. First, you won’t believe it.
I had Covid.
Sure did. The ‘rona caught up with me. To be fair, I did okay. Some of my co-workers struggled a lot more than I did. I felt achy and had a headache. Basically it. OH! And I lost my sense of taste. It’s like getting tackled on the two yard line. I got so close…. but in the end, she showed up and got me. Luckily – no one else caught it, and I am now Covid free! And can I tell you, I was so scared. This is Bella’s senior year, her graduation is tomorrow, and if I had missed it – That would have been terrible.
I don’t mean that to make light of it in anyway. I know how blessed I am that it wasn’t worse. One of my dearest friends and his wife, they were both down for two weeks – and still not completely well. I have had friends in the hospital, and know people who have lost family members to it. I was very, very blessed and lucky.
Now, let’s go on to something a little more uplifting, shall we?
Remember the lady that called me names, etc? The one who made me cry in a facebook live video like Chris Crocker crying over Brittney Spears? I saw her. I saw her in real life. Face to face. And let me tell you – Jesus and his angels must have came down and handcuffed my wrists and paralyzed my feet because it took everything I had to not call her out in front of the crowd that was there. Not to walk up and punch her square in the jaw. I wanted to. I am human. I really wanted to. Guess what guys – I was the bigger person. I looked at her. I saw that her daughter was with her. I wouldn’t embarrass her in front of her kid. (There is one difference between us), but I got another lesson in this. I really did.
I have never been that close to her. In my whole life. She was like 8 feet away. And I realized that she was older than me. Like, I knew she was older than me. But I saw it. She is a lovely woman (in appearance), but she visibly her age. And It shocked me – that someone who looks that age, would act that way. And I know there is no age gap on gossip, meanness, or stupidity. We all know that – but to be fair, it is the first time I ever encountered it. You can expect that from girls. Even young women. But to see someone over 50 – acting like a 20 year old. It made me sad for her.
And for clarity – it took about 5 days for that sadness to set in. Definitely wanted to fight her for the first five. Again, I’m human. But when I thought on it – how sad it must be to feel the need to spin stories on others’ lives for your own entertainment. Or maybe make yourself feel important? Some level of dissatisfaction has to be there.
I want to make a declarative statement – God’s children fail. We all do. This woman is very Christian on her social media. I want to make it clear – gossip, idle chatter – this is not okay. This is not the way we as believers should behave. Nor should we sit in judgement of others. That is why I choose to pity her, and pray that my heart lets go of its anger. We are getting there.
But I want to add, for anyone who may need to hear this, we know gossip is bad. Even so, we find it all too prevalent in society. Worst yet, it’s in our churches.
There are many reasons people struggle with this appalling, divisive, and detrimental act. One of the more obvious ones is justifying it because the gossiper believes what he or she is spreading is true. This is a basic misunderstanding many of us have, so let’s clear it up.
Biblically, gossip is sharing information that ought not be shared. It may or may not be true.
This is where we assume too much concerning gossip. Too many people think it’s OK to share information that shouldn’t be shared, because they believe it is true. So they justify sharing personal, private information that is nobody’s business to share. In their minds it’s fine to destroy things like relationships and reputations because, “Hey, if it’s true, they deserve it.”
Slander is spreading false information. We need to understand that one can be gossiping and slandering at the same time, and one can be gossiping and not slandering at the same time. In other words, gossip can be true and slander is false.
Some information is nobody’s business to share. So what if you have the dirt on somebody else? Why is it OK for you to spread other people’s personal and/or private information?
Jesus said, “I tell you, on the day of judgment people will give account for every careless word they speak, for by your words you will be justified, and by your words you will be condemned” (ESV).
True or not, don’t share others’ personal and/or private things. That’s gossip.
“A gossip betrays a confidence, but a trustworthy person keeps a secret.”
“A perverse person stirs up conflict, and a gossip separates close friends”
Both of those are from Proverbs. You want more info about gossip and what believers should do– there are a lot of great pastors out there who speak about it. Pastor Jeff Adams at Paramount Christian Church has some great articles about it.
*Edited to add – Graduation was a huge success. The podcast is going to launch in a couple weeks, and I am so happy in my life right now. Thanks guys for always standing behind me.
Love Fully. Live Fully. Shine on.