So, Today I got a tattoo.  It hurt bad.  It felt like someone was cutting my wrist with a razor blade – or at least that is what I imagine it would feel like. (I have been fortunate enough to not ever have my wrist cut with a razor blade.)  For anyone who has never had a tattoo – the whole experience can be surreal… Especially if you go to Jack Brown’s here in Fredericksburg.  A lot of different people go there – I was there, a girl getting tattooed(who didn’t have a lot of room left, honestly) – an elderly lady who you would never imagine would be getting a tattoo – you get my drift.  And I am talking to Chance, my tattooist.  He is brutally honest – you never wonder what he’s thinking.  He is callous, in a refreshing way.  This tattoo meant a lot to me – and he knew it… we started talking about Shaun.  My friend – Jacqueline was holding my hand the whole time – for the physical pain along with the emotional pain.  Anyway, I digress.  I start crying, and I told him the part I still have a hard time with is Jacoby’s age.  That he won’t remember firsthand how absolutely amazing his father was.  And that makes me sad.  And here is Chance’s reply – “But think of it – in a way – he will be legendary.  He will never upset his son.  He will never mess him up.  He will always be able to imagine him as a superhero.”  Which for some strange reason, made me smile… Because it’s true..  I will be able to tell Jacoby how amazing his daddy was – and it will never be tainted by anger, punishment, a moment of pure judgement.  It can be pure love without flaw.  And isn’t that as close to Jesus’ love that we can get?  I think so.

Now here’s the kicker…. There is a circle in the cross – that was just going to be shaded.  Chance almost started, lifted it, almost started, lifted it again… and said, “How bout if I put another shaded cross in the center… instead of the other design?”  I smile – look at Jacqueline – she smiles – and in unison we nod.  He does it.  I think that it will be pretty… and then as I am starting to write this blog, I google “two crosses” – here is an excerpt to what I read….

“Why two crosses?” (This was the question posed – and here is the answer)

There are two crosses, because really only two matter.
The first cross=Jesus.  He is the Son of God and was crucified for the sins of the world. Mankind was separated from fellowship with God and doomed by something called sin. We were in trouble and needed a savior. By willingly dying on this cross, Jesus took the punishment for our sin and made eternal life possible. Anyone who accepts Him as their savior receives eternal life. In addition, because God raised Him from the dead, abundant life is available for those who believe.
The second cross=Thief.  This thief was receiving capital punishment for his criminal activities. At first he was hurling insults at Jesus. But before he died, and this is important,(notice the bold and underline), he had a change of heart and asked Jesus to remember him. He never went to church, sang in the choir, or served on a committee. He never dropped money in the offering plate and probably never helped an old lady cross the street. His physical body died that day, but because he accepted Jesus, his soul went to Heaven.

Profound, I know.  And my wrist now is a constant reminder of that for me.  It has the love of my life’s name – and what he used to call me.  But more importantly, it has the symbol for the love of my eternity – Jesus.  And a smaller cross in the center – because if it wasn’t for the big cross – us little ones couldn’t be with our Savior.  So the big cross, the little cross, Shaun’s name and the word BeautifuLL.  It’s my universe all rolled into one.  That because of the cross, and God’s love and sacrifice for us, we can all spend eternity in heaven – worshiping him – and loving our loved ones for eternity.  You know how they say God works in mysterious ways?  Well, today he spoke to me through a tattoo on my arm at Jack Brown’s Tattoo Revival, in Fredericksburg, VA.  Yes – he is everywhere you look – and if you listen, he will speak to you.  Love you all… so much.  And as Shaun once said, “Whoever needs this, I love you – God Loves You – and I am praying for you.”

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