One year ago today, I married the man of my dreams.  My heart, my soul, and my best friend.  The one person in this world who really “got” me.  Who believed in me when no one else did.  Who stood behind me, when everyone was telling me I couldn’t do it.  One year ago today, I was over the moon, and I felt proud and optimistic.  We were finally on the right path.  I never, ever thought, this is the way I would be celebrating our one year anniversary.  Alone in front of a computer dreaming of our wedding day.
If you hadn’t noticed, I was off the grid this past week.  I was on a trip, that well, was much needed.  I traveled on a plane alone.  I got to the hotel – alone.  I switched planes – alone.  I figured out gates, Canada, and well the city of New York – alone.  And guess what?  I am sitting in front of my computer – safe and sound – and I did it.  I made it.  It was a bumpy ride – but I made it.  Before I met Shaun – that would have never ever happened.  He taught me something – and it’s something he wrote to me in one of his many notes… it said, ” You make me feel adventurous, and adventure is my inspiration.  Therefore BeautifuLL, you are my inspiration.”  And that, is one impressive compliment.  So, I was adventurous.  And I became inspired.  For many reasons.  There is so much in my head that I want to share.  So many stories, just waiting to be written.  So today, as my wedding gift to my husband,  it will begin.  Not just my story about he and I – but all the other ones we talked about.  And the new ones that are in my head.  This is my passion and my calling.  I know that now.  And as I was thinking about this, trapped in an airplane – and I look out the window.  What do I see, you ask?  I think it was Shaun, winking at me, and saying, “That’s what I want baby, that’s what I want.  I love you too – and you are doing good.”  You might call it the sun… but the sun doesn’t normally look like this… Not to me.  I love you, daddy – I love you so much.  And I miss you – I miss you more than you will ever know.  No one could ever do for me what you did.  I love you and think about you always.

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